In Poland, when we're really busy and a lot of things is going on around us, we often say: what a mill! This is how I feel. A lot of things to do, limited time for that... And all this Festival of Absurdal Art makes me crazy! I was made a Food Manager and now, apart from plenty of things I have always been doing, like attending language courses and my great subjacts at Uni, I have some fabulous, unsolvable concerns like: how I'm supposed to provide great, tasty, tummy-filling meals for artists, stars, VIPs, jury memebers, basically everyone, during 5 days of festival for just 2000zł (approx. 500 Euro)? The most terrible thing is that I'm so affraid that I fail... everyone in this AEGEE Katowice is so well-organized and active, all the time I hear about their successes with providing this or that... all the time they succeed and have some agreement papers from their sponsors already signed... Only I cannot say that I succeeded this week! Why? What have I done wrong that I cannot proudly announce any success, even a little one, I don't care, like having a 100 packets of crisps for opening lectures? Why? What can I do more than calling all the possible sponsors and receiving dry mails full of spelling mistakes that they are not interested? The point is, that if I don't find any sponsors, I'll have to spend a lot of AEGEE money on food, while I have only 2000 zł from our budget... But wait a sec... maybe it's my mistake that I tell all the time about my not having anything, when they all also have ups and downs, but only say loud about their success when they succeed? Maybe I make mistake showing myself as a week person who can't even provide any food for a festival? And how to change it? I cannot keep silent to cover my lack of anything... An example from a while ago: I try to be helpful while all these mail discussions about details of a fastival, and what I get? A mail with polite, but simple 'shut up, you're making a mess' message. Why again? I try to be helpful! Well, they don't care about my oppinion anyway. I dream of great, long sleep with no Absurd Festival Absurdalia 2007 with its mutant snail as a logo... I seriously consider quitting after this all mess I agreed co-creating... Hmm, the matter of you wanting doing a lot and then only wanting to quit is very interesting thing to think through, I have to find a while to think about that ^_^ Well, that's me - a full time Philosopher ^_^ Take care, Hannah